Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis needs a shock collar
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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