I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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