I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
well you can't waste a boner
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
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So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
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i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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