i love accidental penises.
there was a trapeze. enough said
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
