I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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