do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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