New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
