His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words: blizzard sex
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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