Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
