Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
