is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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