My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
