That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
