its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
You took a bar mat shot.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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