I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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