My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize