If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
