Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize