Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize