Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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