so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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