it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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