sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
