shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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