you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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