I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
So vagazzling was a success
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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