haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
