You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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