I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Fuck appropriateness.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
