I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
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