No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
COCAINE IS GR8
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
