Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
