"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
