Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
