Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
