I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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