Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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