I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize