Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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