So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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