guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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