Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
