you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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