Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
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I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife