wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I hope mine doesn't look like that
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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