I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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