she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
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did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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