Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
