So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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