we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
