Whod you bang
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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